also i have so many loose ends to tie up and things to complete before classes end on friday. it just feels to overwhelming at times. 

and things are shifting and changing and i’m realizing its ok to not know what to feel. but here i am again, waiting at an in-between, this feel so surreal as if this was but a dream. but its not a dream, this is life, and its scary, and real, and full of uncertainties. all i know is my chest aches and there is a catch in my throat that just won’t go away, i’m ready to wipe the facade of my happiness off my face. 

why do i assume everyone is perfect and has themselves pulled together? because more often then not its not the case. 

i’m literally so tired i think I’m either going to cry, or pass out, or cry while passing out. my throat has a lump in it, so its definitely going to be the third option and i’m aching, and worrying too much. i’m losing motivation, i feel like i’m just going through the motions, instead of actually doing anything. its funny how you think escaping into oblivion will help, but often times it just doesn’t, instead it would just end badly. i think i need to stabilize myself before i make any more decisions and i need to stop over analyzing and making assumptions about the people around me. 

sometimes i just feel like i’ll never finish what i set out to acomplish and that i always fail to meet the expectations i set for myself. 

the bruise on my foot looks like a little galaxy

snow and warm coats and being helpful and harry potter marathons and diet coke and riley and waking up early because i got lots of sleeep….mmnnnn yes its the last week of break.